I have no joy when I learn something new.
I learn lots of new things these days. I at least learn one new skill a year because I have to in order to survive in this new century as a worker and a creator.
I hate when people say they're proud of me when I accomplish something new. All I can think of is the criticism and blame that seems imminent when I do anything I haven't done before and then start doing it regularly.
It feels inevitable, the blame, the criticism and the feeling that I will never be truly proficient in anything, as I learn more and more things and fear the few true skills I do have are starting to deteriorate.
I used to say in this new world it's change or die. These days I feel like taking out the "or" and using "and" instead.
I learn lots of new things these days. I at least learn one new skill a year because I have to in order to survive in this new century as a worker and a creator.
I hate when people say they're proud of me when I accomplish something new. All I can think of is the criticism and blame that seems imminent when I do anything I haven't done before and then start doing it regularly.
It feels inevitable, the blame, the criticism and the feeling that I will never be truly proficient in anything, as I learn more and more things and fear the few true skills I do have are starting to deteriorate.
I used to say in this new world it's change or die. These days I feel like taking out the "or" and using "and" instead.
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