This Week's Friendly Reminder

Remember what people are really dying for: A distraction.

American Haiku: Trump Cries De-fense! De-fense!

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read others I've written since by clicking here and scrolling down. 

American Haiku: Trump Cries De-fense! De-fense!

 

Five-seven-five hey!

Just go up and say I won!

I don't meander. I have never meandered! I am an not a meandering loser!

American Haiku: The Last Trump Lawyer

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read others I've written since, by clicking here and scrolling down.

 

American Haiku: The Last Trump Lawyer

 

Five-seven-five hah!

I don't even have to spell.

You don't have the votes! You don't have the votes!

This Week's Hard Reminder

Trump supporters are still out there. They are waiting. Get ready.

No Reminder Needed for This

If he had been gone after January 2017, it still wouldn't have been soon enough. It can't happen soon enough now.

SAFE DISTANCE EDITION - Stone Soup Croutons, 1-13-21: An Edgelord's Last Day

Stone Soup Croutons is a weekly poem I write using lines and impressions picked from Stone Soup Poetry's open mic readers and features. I figure out a title (and sometimes the rest of the poem) later. You can read the other ones I've done since 2015 here.

I also have an award nominated book out now collecting the best of my first year of poems. Click here to purchase it. 

Jon Wesick featured on Inauguration Groundhog Day! a perfect storm of words from the open mic and the star performer. Are we seeing the end of the edgelord (among other people) after all these long years? My mind seemed to think so when I wrote the poem below. I regret not attempting to put more physics in this week's work.

The poem is a mess. I make no excuses. 

The poem is as crazy as my earliest crouton poems in 2015, when I'd be racing every morning to finish them less than twelve hours after a Stone Soup night. 

It's all over the place, no set rhythm or pace throughout. 

2015 was also the same time the edgelords were coming into power. A more chaotic time than others might remember. 

I could say this poem is chaotic because it's a call back to that time when the edgelords are starting to lose power. Sunrise meets sunset. 

But that would be just an excuse. and we're not really out of the edgelord woods yet.

Thanks for reading.

An Edgelord's Last Day 

Be a pirate and board your own home.

Dwight of the bumblebees, 

you sole roommate,

protests sloppiness in your ear, 

guards leftover breakfast.

American Haiku: Mitch's Slight of Hand

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read my first one, and others I've written since, by clicking here and scrolling down.

 

 

American Haiku: Mitch's Slight of Hand

 

Five-seven-five wait!

I've always been on your side!

(please don't notice the blood...please don't notice the blood...)

It's Happening!

It may come to nothing, but I'm excited!

Additional and Vital Friendly Reminder

For Trump to still be called Mr. President after these last four years would be disgraceful.

 Impeach him. Please. 

If it doesn't happen, let's stick with calling him Mr. Trump from now on.

To Mark the Day

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read my first one, and others I've written since, by clicking here.

American Haiku: Acquittal Day

Fuck five-seven-five!
GOP stacks everything!
Our vote counts! Our vote counts!
 

My Two Cents Told in American Haiku

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read my first one, and others I've written since, by clicking here.

American Haiku: Senate Predictions

Five-Seven-Five No!
Witnesses! Let's wrap this up!
T.G.I.F.! T.G.I.F.!

American Haiku Back Again

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read my first one, and others I've written since, by clicking here.

American Haiku: Trump's Defense Team

Five-seven-five GO!
Ignore man with manuscript.
Beat the clock! Beat the clock!

It's American Haiku Time! (yay?)

When I started my Sarcastic Haiku series, I wrote my first American Haiku. You can read my first one, and others I've written since, by clicking here.

American Haiku: Mitch McConnell

More like Five-Seven--!
You'll never get full picture!
Nyah-nyah-na-na-nyah! Nyah-nyah-na-na-nyah!

How About That 2019, Huh?

Think the alt-right news sources took last month's impeachment well? Let's see with the last Tales of the Alt-Blight found poem of 2019 as we parse the scare headlines of December. Thanks for reading these. The newest one, "The Roar for the Roaring Twenties," is up now at Medium.
 

Advent Calendar, Day Nineteen BONUS

Hope you enjoyed an good #Impeachmas people!

This Week's Friendly Reminder

I had something prepped for today but put it aside for this message on the sidewalk spotted while walking through Cambridge.

Impeach! Impeach! Impeach!

Not sure if this had been written months ago or just a couple of days prior. Either way, it's appropriate. Oh, yes.