Turning in My Old License Photo

 

 

When I told people I was going to the Registry of Motor Vehicles to get a new license, they asked why I didn't just get one mailed to me.

 

Truth is, I've already done that three, maybe four times now. Maybe more. Somehow.

 

Even when I thought I used up all my online good will, I was still able to get a license mailed to me in 2018. How I've been able to keep using this picture is a mystery.

 

Now that I really look at the photo they've used over and over again, I'm pretty sure it was taken in 2003, just after my breakup and failed attempt to live in Rhode Island. I might even still technically be in my twenties in this picture.

 

That was way before the death of my father, my sister, my two grandmothers and my last surviving grandfather. Among other losses.

 

The last smirk before a thousand reality slaps. 

 

Look at the idiot. He had no idea what was coming, did he? He thought a messy breakup after getting kicked out of a Brookline apartment was the worst thing that could happen to him.

 

It's a miracle he recognized any of the good things that happened to him.

So for the first time in almost two decades, my license is going to look like actual present me. 

I try to not get sentimental about my younger years. In my twenties, thirties and forties, there has been stuff about me I've loathed that I'm glad to have fixed to the best of my ability. 

 

But now that I've hit 50, I think I'm going to miss this clueless joker.