Stone Soup Croutons, 1-17-24: Twenty-First Century Pitch

Stone Soup Croutons is a weekly poem I write using lines and impressions selected from Stone Soup Poetry's open mic readers and features. I figure out a title (and sometimes the rest of the poem) later. You can read the other ones I've done since 2015 here.

 

I also have a book collecting the best of my first year of poems. Click here to purchase it.

 

Stone Soup's open mic was on Wednesday last week. I attended a funeral for an on Friday, which is when I usually write my crouton. On weekends, my discipline dwindles down to zero. I knew the amazing open mic was going to help me produce something good. I just didn't have the bandwidth. 

 

Sorry it's so late. I can't wait to get back to normal this coming week.

It's not gonna happen, is it?

Thanks for reading.

Twenty-First Century Pitch

AI will replace you,

and you will like it!

Your year book photos

will be perfect, you

sitting on unmossed

rock. Smile awkward,

ripe with anxiety, 

but some things can't

be changed. The rest?
Better. Lineage picked

from an array of 

high level NPCs. 

 

High school song

a symphony of keenly

synthesized whale songs

replacing thugish clatter.

Optional adventures 

include broken legs

 

from sledding, or a 

young runaway attempt.

First job interview will

be just a simulation,

but so will your first job,

résumé snow blank. 

New Year's resolutions

assigned according 

to lowest stats, personal

demons categorized.

Be a proper gentleman

by spring, marry a mate

programmed to be

virginal in perpetuity. 

Get pregnant before

graduation day. From

 

immature ejaculate to

immaculate conception

 

that horrifies and pacifies

by looking like your Mom.

 

Special thanks to Richard Spisak, Karen A. Sklany, John Engstrom, Bil Lewis, Ari Whipple, Jan Rowe, Jon Wesick, Ken Johnson, Jeff Taylor, Rich Boucher, Ethan Mackler, James Van Looy and Robert Fleming.